I just got to enjoy a special independence day treat. It turns out I can see my city fireworks from my "office" window. I'd thought about going out to see them in person from the park that's just a few blocks away, but I'm pretty much on my own this weekend and didn't feel like struggling through the crowds, or sitting by myself in the middle of a huge throng. It's a nice show up close, but sometimes the people really get to me. Last time I went out I was sitting right in front of a family with a kid who had to announce the launch of every firework in the show. As soon as he could see the trail of light and smoke snaking up into the sky, he'd shout "there's one!" or "there's two!", "and another one!" over and over again. Rather than encouraging him to just enjoy the show quietly, his parents were egging him on by telling him whenever he missed one. I'm all for a little oohing and aahing when a nice explosion goes off, but shouting every time you see one launch? That's just a little too annoying by my standards.

So anyway I decided to just stay at home this time around. I kicked back in the desk chair, put my feet up, had a few sips of margarita, and prepared to enjoy the show. I was sitting in the dark, of course, because it's easier to see outside, and naturally that got me thinking of other things, like having a little fun while I was enjoying the fireworks. That's yet another benefit of being by yourself, after all.

It was more luck than intentional timing, but I finished right in the middle of the grand finale. Burst after burst of light exploded into the sky in time to my own personal explosions. In some mythologies, the Earth is created by a masturbating god, so why couldn't the masturbation of a lesser mortal generate his own fireworks? As I came I could hear the cheers and applause of thousands of people coming in through the window, and it was a lot of fun to imagine that they were all cheering me on.