Too Much When...

You Know You Masturbate too Much When ...

Average: 3.5 (13 votes)


  • People ask you why you're limping.
  • Your wet dreams are about masturbation.
  • You stop in at the local adult store to buy more lube, and the clerk asks you if you want "the usual."
  • You fantasize about masturbating while you're having sex.
  • One forearm is noticeably larger than the other.
  • The doctor says you have the most shrunken prostate he's ever seen.
  • Not only have you nicknamed your hand "Rosy Palmer," but you also have nicknames for her five sisters as well.
  • Your watch beeps every hour ... to tell you it's time to slip away for a few minutes.
  • You've worn off your fingerprints.
  • You don't need lube, because your hand is still slippery from last time.
  • You come, but nothing comes out.
  • Someone's going down on you, but you push them away because your hand feels better.
  • You automatically get an erection every time you sit down at the computer.

Submitted by Hardy on Thu, 01/10/2008 - 07:38. categories [ ]